so...

it appears I'm not going to be taking any classes this semester... I'm not sure If it's a good thing...

this is what I wanted I guess...

a break

so I went to Washington for a few days. It was little annoying... I have this issue... to say it in short...
I've been made fun of my entire life... the result is social retardation.
Other than that Washington ROCKED. Washington is on my list of places I could live someday. The best part by far was the white water rafting trip. It took all day and we went down the river twice.

I didn't really take... hardly any pictures ...at all...

Oh well at least they're in my head...

as for being socially retarded it gave me lots of time to read most of the 1st three books of the twilight series...and also reminded me of people, moments, regrets, happier times... and more sad times... and also reminded me of my love of the band Emery ( good old fashioned screamo).

THese mental memories and images leave a lasting effect... although from what I've noticed if I want them to fade ... in time they all can.

this up and coming semester...

that's 15 credits stretched across 6 classes.
I know I should be getting an education... but I strongly dislike the beginning boring classes... and well I strongly dislike school in general.

I'm applying to become a student in the Winter.
If I don't get accepted then I shouldn't spend more time here.

I am only here to become a actual full time student ...and if I don't get accepted then I guess I'm Not meant to go to school here..I would take it as a sign that I belong somewhere else.

In that event I have No clue what the next step would be. Perhaps I could go back to Texas, or I could move to a place that I like or would like to live Alaska, Washington, New Hampshire, Colorado, & Oregon .. but we'll see.

So wish me luck.-r^3

Another beautiful Sunday

I've been having some of the most busy weeks lately. I wake up one morning and it's Monday and the next thing I know I'm figuring out the schedule for the coming up week because it's suddenly Saturday again.
Sundays are great. I typically don't have to work on Sundays and if I do It's never for too Long.
Today I slept for about 11 hours... I officially woke up around 1:40pm. I layed around all day I finished the movie I fell asleep during the night before and then started looking up an Idea for making a marketable art piece... with not much success and a startling reminder that I don't have the abilities to make the piece I want to... I forced myself to go out.
With the Ipod, bag filled with some of the most randoms things, and spiffy little tri-pod ready I headed out to get my bike which was left at work last night.


I ran into this tree some one put weird rectangular prism shaped object in it.^


Eventually I made it over to the train tracks. I haven't been there in a little while. I always thought this sign was kind of funny. I think it had bullet holes in it... which isn't so funny.




I had never really thought about the fact that some times the carts on the train tracks have ladders on them nor the fact that I had never climbed one... and so today I did!^

It obviously was Not an amazingly different view. The fact that I am a little afraid of heights made it not as enjoyable...and needless to say I didn't take too many pictures once i had made it to the top.



The sun was coming down quickly and I wanted to go to one more place before it was too dark. The only quick place I could think of was past Smith park where I go running sometimes.






I'm not exactly sure I'll ever be able to manage to find friends who understand that Some times I just need to get away. Sometimes I am quiet and don't really talk for the day... some times I go away for hours at a time to do some art, take pictures, or to go explore the area. The people that I have met that I like to bring along are rare and important to me.
Unfortunately I'm extremely shy and find it difficult to be outgoing. Which only perpetuates what I've always dealt with being me and being it with out many friends.... it's easier this way.
Today was great.

it's done

'Found' Was Made around January of this year. It mostly about what had happened from about 2006 to 2008 of January In short it's mostly about completely losing who I was..then and finding it again... and also what it took and what it still requires.
It is amazing all that can change in such a short amount of time... and it's also amazing what needs to change but still hasn't. ^


One night 6/22/08 http://m33t88.blogspot.com/2008/06/c-o-n-s-t-r-u-c-t-i-o-n.html after getting out of class I went over to the school store. I was in a incredibly good mood and bought myself and ice cream sandwich and some chocolate milk. When I had made it out of the MC I saw this sunset over the construction site. It is what initially inspired my latest finished piece. ^


In class I have a very difficult time paying attention and to help listen I doodle on my notes to help my ears focus. I have been told that it's a waste of time... but it is where I form some of my best ideas for paintings. ^

Eventually I often drop the idea of a certain piece. It isn't uncommon typically it'll be something simple and meaningless that I can never get a full mental image of, however, sometimes there are emotions and feelings that I want depicted in a certain piece won't go away and in time the idea develops enough for me to pursue making it.^




Top Left ^

Bottom Left ^

Top Center ^

Bottom Center ^

Top Right ^

Bottom Right^

I start by taping six pieces of drawing paper together. Then I Very lightly pencil in what I want to paint. Next I block in with colors all of the main parts of the painting. Then in a completely unorganized style I add in everything with water color, acrylics, oil pastels, sharpies, & guesso. Nothing is added in any specific order. I often get tired of one part and move on to another. I'll leave certain parts unfinished because I'm not completely certain if I want it there or if it's how I want it. I usually get frustrated with all my stuff, or get distracted with life... just like this piece; I left it alone for days at a time. I am not big on spending lots of time on one piece. I don't like to make people or objects exact because I'm making it for myself... and I know what everything is ... and well that's all that really matters. This is while I feel I will never be able to market my art. So.... Eventually I get the point Where I feel like I can leave the piece happy. I feel that Nothing is ever finished & thusly No art piece is ever really done; just abandoned.







I'm content with it like this.^ -" Progressing"

A lot has happened close to the time before I started this painting. A lot happened during this painting. It all seemed to come to a close as I finished. Now that It's done
I realize a lot about the past two semesters and about myself.
So basically what I've learned can be all stated in what this painting meant to me...
that there is much to be improved upon. I am fortunate to have goals set in site. I know what I want and how I should get there, however, for me it's discouraging all that must happen to get there. The distractions, contention, and confusion doesn't help. Although, it may seem like everyone around you is trying to help and be there it can at times cripple and hurt... and leave you uncertain of how to do things your own way & on your own terms. In time every one leaves and can forget about you and that's when you know who cares and who can't. It is when it's important that you have your own path to follow.
There is much to gain and without knowledge and Patience I can never have it.
It is difficult at times to fail and to restart but that is when I have to remember that there is a plan for each and everyone of us. I have to always look towards the sunlight of truth, so that the shadow of error, discouragement, and disappointment Will fall behind and leave a clear view leading to exaltation and eternal life.
Eventually things will more naturally fall into place. In time I will be where I should. .... At some point I'll know what I'm doing...


"Progressing" - Rachel Rebecca Rudd , Friday August 8, 2008

the graffiti wall

me and mi buddy visited the graffiti wall on the way bak from JIB pretty sweet.
This summer has been going by quickly with the two jobs and trying to sleep and catch up with everything... and that's completely fine with me. I may be taking a bunch of religon classes this up coming semester and that'd be completely fine with me c:.
Things are crazy annnd I have No clue what I'm doing but i feel safe and like everything is going to be alright & well that just makes everyday better .